"Life is a Journey, Not a Race."

I remember a long time ago, second grade specifically, my teacher had a sign outside of her classroom that read "Life is a journey, not a race." That line seems to be coming up frequently in my thought processes and my discussions with others these days...

With my 30th birthday looming about a month away, I've been feeling a lot of unintentional pressure lately and feeling like I'm not living up to others' expectations, like I'm "falling behind" so to speak. To that I pose a serious question: do you measure success by pieces of paper, things that you own, finding a partner, having children, etc? Why do humans get to decide the value of "things" and "measure success?" Despite the fact that I have very few of these things, I'd still consider my life a success to this point. I'm living, breathing and learning new things every single day and I've had some incredible experiences along the way.

By "normal" standards, I've also come pretty far. I went to high school, college, got a degree and a job just like I was "supposed to." So the next steps were to find a mate, buy a house, get married, have kids and continue on with the American lifestyle, working a 9-5 job for the rest of my adult life until retirement, right? At least, that's what I feel was expected of me. I've known for a while that that's just not what I'm looking for.

This doesn't mean I'm totally at peace with this feeling. I'm actually a little insecure about it. I don't know exactly where I "fit in," if I fit in at all, but I keep telling myself that's alright. I'd like to have children some day, but to try to schedule my entire life seems foolish. That's never been the way I've worked best. Things happen and plans get derailed, and just as often amazing things happen as well. Life is supposed to be organic.

What I'm really looking for is peace of mind, and to think that's going to be found in an office or a school or doing what others say I "should" be doing operating on anyone else's timetable but my own just doesn't make any sense to me. I'm going to find it and I'm going to find it naturally at my own pace. Life is a journey, not a race, and I'm not in any hurry right now.

That's the Stuff-ing!

When you live and work trade at a sustainable living skills center, food becomes an extremely important and meaningful part of your life. We grow a lot of vegetables in our ample garden space and cook for upwards of 10 people on the daily. Thanksgiving might as well be every day here. But anyway...

On this day, we've all decided to make a dish for the group. I chose to make something near and dear to my heart: stuffing (or filling as some of my family calls it). I've baked stuffing before and helped out with others' recipes, but this is the first time I've actually baked the bread that I was going to use:

Actually, this is the first time I've ever baked my own bread. Having done it, I can't believe I haven't done it sooner. It's so unbelievably simple! It's so empowering! Think about it: mix some flour, yeast, salt and water and watch the dough rise before your very eyes. How awesome is that? And then you bake it and it tastes so amazing that you hesitate to cube it and put it into a casserole, instead wanting to just eat the entire loaf right there. But I digress...

This is also the first time I've attempted to make vegan stuffing. To add a little thickness and protein, I chose to marinate some cubed tempeh (fermented soy beans and grains) in tamari and ginger, and then fry/glaze it. This is the before pic as I forgot to take an after pic. Trust me when I say it was awesome:

Using the same pan with all of the juicy tempeh goodness still lingering inside, I sauteed some onions, garlic, carrots, celery and mushrooms with a little bit of parsley. I mixed them in with the tempeh, made a casserole with that mix and the cubed bread and baked for an hour at 350. The squash are added for effect:

I haven't tried the final product as of this writing, but it smelled amazing!

On that note, I'm going to help out others in the kitchen to get the rest of this meal on the table. Wherever you are and whatever you're doing today, much love and have a Happy Thanksgiving.

Yauna Take a Sauna?

Since the Shelter Series ended, those of us who have stayed here at Aprovecho were given the opportunity to work on independent projects. Mine, as you're probably aware, have been focused on woodworking. Yesterday, I completed my most recent endeavor into designing and building my own benches to fit the Yurt Sauna that my friends were building, better known as the Yauna:

You can see it overlooking the pond in the background. A closer view:

It's obviously not complete, but it is in working order and DAMN it works well. It's about an 8 foot diameter structure made primarily out of cinder blocks, bamboo, straw clay, cob and - believe it or not - a satellite dish frame for a roof! For many reasons, I'm really happy to see this building standing. For one, taking a sauna is very relaxing, and if you've never taken one, I highly recommend it. Two, it's made of natural and recycled materials and because of its simplicity, it only took a month and a half to construct. Three, it's a project that everyone here has helped with on some level, just like in the Shelter Series.

I mentioned in the bench post I wrote a few weeks ago that I was given an idea and told to do with it what I please. I chose to custom design three benches to fit into the space inside so that the back edges would follow the contour of the interior wall, and if I do say so myself, they turned out to be pretty amazing:

They're very sturdy, smooth for the comfort of your naked ass, and as I found out, they can survive a fall from a moving vehicle! I can't tell you enough how happy I am with how this worked out. I was able to work on things to strengthen my amateur skill set. Because I made three of them, I was able to develop a system and perfect it. I was able to work at my own pace without pressure. Most importantly, the design worked and these benches will also be beneficial for many others for many years to come.

By the way, Happy Thanksgiving! I'll be posting another entry later today that's more holiday-themed.

Milestones

My car went over the 100,000 mile mark yesterday as I was on my way to visit my new favorite place, the Oregon Coast. I often celebrate when my car reaches a certain mileage. It tells a story of sorts and reminds me of where I was at certain times in my life.

I don't have a picture, but I remember my car crossing 10,000 on Interstate 95 in Florida in 2008. I know he's probably reading this and he has a picture somewhere, so Dad, help me out if you can find that one.

20,000-40,000 are pretty forgettable. I know a lot of cool stuff happened in there...beach trips, bachelor parties, college reunions and I even left the country for a few days. But alas I don't have pictures and I don't remember the experiences, so I'm guessing I was probably driving to or from work on said occasions.

Anyway, 50,000 was one of my favorites. I was on my way to the Outer Banks, having left after work on a Friday night. I drove until I was too tired to continue and stopped at a rest stop to sleep for a few hours. I awoke the next morning to cross the Chesapeake Bay Bridge/Tunnel:

What a beautiful day. What a wonderful feeling. Of course, later that day my windshield was smashed by a golf-ball-sized rock, but that's another story.

At 60,000, a friend and I were driving through a snow storm to see the Flyers play in New Jersey.

Note the traction control light, which was on NOT because I was skidding but because of a computer malfunction. I kept driving anyway. I had a hockey game to catch! We won, by the way. Go Flyers.

6 months later, I had taken on a new job, moved to Maryland and was on the Capital Beltway. I don't actually have a picture of the Beltway or the exact mile mark. Strangely enough, I was cruising on it when it WASN'T jammed full of traffic. I remember there was a lot on my mind that day, so understandably my focus was other places, but I DID take a picture just after the fact. Close enough, right?

At 80,000, I was on the Beltway in the morning. Eh...anything to keep my mind off the traffic jam, I suppose:

Best moment ever, when your odometer spells "BOOBS" and you almost don't mind being stuck in Beltway traffic. ALMOST:

I don't have a pic of 90,000. I know I was in South Dakota and I wasn't driving at the time. I know the driver pretty well, so hunting it down SHOULD be easy...

And lastly, but certainly not leastly, 100fuckingthousand, about to enter a tunnel in the Coast Range:

Not the best weather inland, but the coast was beautiful as it always is.

Over 100,000 miles, 2 countries, up and down the East Coast and across the country. So, where to next?

Imagine That

Imagine yourself in a space that you've helped to make "your own." With the help of others, you've helped to organize and clean it to make it a place you and others want to be around. You, yourself are drawn to it on a daily basis.

Imagine you've been given an idea to help a friend add something to their space. You've been given nothing but the idea and the freedom to do with it what you please.

Imagine working on that idea from the ground up. You find yourself in "your" space, thinking up designs and working on it whenever you can find time. In fact, it occupies most of your day, and you're completely alright with that.

Imagine listening to music, moving with the beat and singing along as you do what you do. You experience a wide spectrum of feelings along the way, each one offering something unique to the incredible processes going on in your mind and your muscles.

Imagine how great it feels to figure things out for yourself, to make mistakes and not get frustrated because you know you're going to learn from them.

Imagine someone coming by to say "Come out and play" (so to speak) and responding with "No thanks, I'd really like to keep going with what I'm doing" and genuinely meaning it. You've forgotten what time it is because it doesn't matter.

Imagine forgetting about everything else in the world and truly being peaceful and happy in the present moment just because...

Imagine seeing discarded and left over wood becoming something structural, simple but also beautiful and empowering because you designed and built it with your own hands in less than a day and a half.

Imagine this bench with a properly placed, properly cut piece of REAL wood (instead of a plywood form). And then believe it because it's happening tomorrow.

I Saw Horse

I finally completed my first sawhorse last Thursday! I say finally because it feels like it's taken me three weeks to finish it, but really I've only been able to work on it for about 3 days in those three weeks, so for a first project, it really didn't take me all that long to complete. I was given a set of plans and was basically told to figure it out. I made plenty of mistakes along the way, but of course they were all valuable learning experiences. Most of this was cut by hand (the pegs were pre-made). And yea, it turned out pretty awesome, if I do say so myself:

It is a beefy little fella, but that's part of what makes it so cool in my opinion. It weighs about 35 pounds (I think, but I didn't actually weigh it) and can support the weight of at least 5 grown adults. Don't ask me how I know that.

Here's some joint detail. Drilling through that knot was a pain in the ass and generally not advised, but I think it makes the peg look almost like it's part of the actual wood, which is kinda cool. When I pegged this thing together and saw how tightly the joints fit, it was an indescribable good feeling. Take a closer look:

I had so much fun building it that I kinda want to build another one (which you normally would anyway), but it's unnecessary, as there was already a pre-existing saw horse without a mate, part of the reason I chose this project. I like to make things feel more complete:

One of the cool things about building is that when you're finished, you get the chance to stand back and really admire what you've done with your time and effort. I guess that can be true of a lot of things. I'm going to finish up here with an aside on my growing appreciation for the effort it takes to grow and process delicious food, an appreciation I feel a lot of people don't have these days. I've been living and working alongside some very talented gardeners over the past 3 months, as well as eating the food they have helped grow. They put their effort into that much in the same way I do building. I've sadly almost taken it for granted. What really drove this point home was this bowl of almonds:

The almond tree on this property has been growing for years, and the almonds on it grew over a summer. I spent the better part of a morning harvesting those almonds with 3 others, and the better part of that afternoon removing the hulls. The pits found inside the hulls were then dried for about a month and those pits were then cracked open with a hammer to reveal the almonds inside. Harvesting almost an entire tree (you can't really get the ones on top that easily) yielded the contents of the bowl you see above. All of that effort for just that much food, and though delicious, it really did make me think... It was still worth the effort. The experience of harvesting was fun, working together with some friends to process them was fun too, and yea, I like almonds, so of course eating them was the most rewarding part.

But I digress...have a wonderful week and happy non-daylight savings time (is it standard time?) to everyone. Cheers!