Bartender: I'm going to take a wild guess you're from Philly.
Me: Yes, but I actually just moved to Columbus.
That exchange happened as I was sitting in Railhead Brewery in Upstate New York on a random Summer day last June. I'd stopped for lunch on my way back to Columbus after spending a week fishing and outdoorsing. Her guess wasn't entirely unfounded. I was wearing a Philadelphia Brewing Co. t-shirt and a Flyers hat. I guess I do have a tendency to wear my heart on my sleeve. Or head.
But what's odd about that exchange is that I'm not actually from Philly, if we're taking the meaning literally. Still, I said what I said, and I meant it. I've never identified more with a place, and as I sit here typing this a year later, I know that no other place will ever eclipse that. I'm both proud and saddened to say that...
I still can't believe it's already been a year since I moved out of the City of Brotherly Love, a place I called home for more than 4 years. It seems like so much longer, and not in a W.C. Fields kind of way. My girlfriend half-jokingly has said on numerous occasions that if Philadelphia were a person, I'd probably try to date it. Accepting that as truth, I don't think I can explain exactly why that is. Just love is all.
“And, when you want something, all the universe conspires in helping you to achieve it.”- Paulo Coelho
I moved to Philly in 2014. I was without a full-time job or even a real place to live as I was picking up the ashes from a failed cross-country adventure. After a few weeks "vacationing" at my Mom's, I knew that my born-and-raised home just wasn't going to cut it for my next step. I decided to move into a dingy room above a bar with not much more than what I could fit in my car. Fool proof plan, right?
But somehow, everything about Philly just seemed to line up. Even before I moved into a place of my own, I was "living there" by house-sitting for some friends, renting a hostel, and occasionally spending a weekend here or there with whoever was gracious enough to accommodate a couch surfer in exchange for some good company and maintenance. I worked for 7 different part-time or freelance employers in my first 8 months alone just to make it happen. Some days, I basically worked to pay for a place to stay so I could work. Thinking back on it, I don't know how I did it some days.
Like I said, it always worked out. That's one of the reasons I've often said that I didn't find Philly; Philly found me. My first regular job there at the Strengthening Health Institute was a completely random happenstance, and things grew steadily from there. I had booked a consultation with Denny Waxman in January 2014 to attempt to get my physical health back on track after some issues I was experiencing. After meeting him, he offered me a job working in the office at the school to help produce videos of macrobiotic seminars taught by him and his wife Susan.
It was only a part-time job, but it was a good enough start to keep me in the city regularly and in the best of spirits to boot. I finally had a chance to utilize my skills for a project I was actually passionate about for the first time in what felt like forever, and I ended up working for two amazing bosses who became my mentors and some of my closest friends. I met my roommate(s) through the school, and I met a ton of other amazing people too. SHI was also ultimately responsible for me finding Wash Cycle Laundry, and the rest is history as the saying goes. In many ways, I'm quite lucky they found me.
"New York is a place where people go to reinvent themselves; Philadelphia is a place where people discover who they are."
- Chef Peter McAndrews
I occasionally try to remember who I was before Philly, and I still don't have any idea who I was back then. I mean, I know we're all at least a little different today than we were five years ago, but it's not even close. I didn't even own a bike when I moved there. Now, I can't imagine myself without one (or five). I was also still a vegetarian for less than a year at the time. Now, I don't know how I survived eating the way I used to (well, I do know, but I don't like it). I had also never lived in a dense urban setting. Now, I find myself longing for it. I could go on.
Somehow, many years ago, I knew I belonged there. For most of my adult life, I never felt truly comfortable where I lived or doing most of the things I was doing. Philly changed all of that.
Philly was so damn special that I was willing to attempt a distance relationship for a second time in my life after vowing never to do it again in 2013. In some strange way, things have come full circle. My girlfriend and I visited this past weekend, and when we left, I had a strange deja vu. I used to get this sad feeling when one of us would have to leave the other at the end of a weekend visit. I got that same feeling when we had to head back to Columbus yesterday.
So why did I decide to move on from a place that I adore so deeply? Because we were ready to combine our family, and the timing just wasn't (yet) right for Philly to be our base camp. It was without a doubt the most difficult decision I've ever had to make, and that's because it was correct. My girlfriend doesn't like to admit this, but she cried just as much as I did when I moved out last year. I can't blame her. Basically half of our relationship was spent in Philly. There's a pretty good reason why we've vowed to return every year on our anniversary, and why we'll return hopefully for good one day.
I sit here one year later knowing that I'm not in a bad place, and knowing that I moved to Columbus for all the right reasons. But, I still miss everything about Philly, and not a day goes by that I don't think about it. In full admittance, I get so homesick sometimes it actually hurts. The following is an incomplete list of things I pine for on a regular basis:
- Seeing 200+ year old historical landmarks on a daily basis
- Parks on Tap in Summer
- BYOBs
- Free daily newspapers
- Beer Week
- Consistent open mic nights, and the occasional paid gig
- Sports that actually matter (sorry not sorry OSU)
- Eagles chants everywhere
- Day trips to the shore
- Day trips to Mom and Dad's
- Good pizza and bread
- Passyunk Avenue
- Being able to bike basically anywhere within or without reason
- Having a local coffee shop within walking distance
- Parallel parking
- "Howya doin?"
- Row homes
- Trolleys
- Amtrak
- Only needing my car to leave the city
- Bumping into a random friend everywhere I went
- For that matter, having several different circles of friends instead of just one
I know I'm still relatively new in Ohio. I still have a lot of work to do to build a better life for us out here. I really, really don't want to paint the picture of Columbus as a bad place. It's not bad. It's just...not Philly. And that's OK.
For all of these and so many more reasons I can't begin to write, lately when someone asks me where I'm from, I'll respond proudly: I'm from Philly. Because I've always loved it, and always will.
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